dealing with children with behavior disorder

The basic method for dealing with children with behavior disorder is to

• Promote self-esteem and confidence every chance you can. Catch your child doing something great and praise him/her.
• Provide opportunities for the child to become responsible. When they take responsibility well, let him/her know.
• Always be objective and understanding - do not lose your patience even though you are tempted to.
• Use your best judgment at all times, remain objective and seek to understand.
• Patience, patience, patience! Even though you may be very frustrated.
• Communicate your expectations with a minimal number of rules and routines to be followed. Think big, start small.
• Involve the child when you are establishing rules and routines. Ask for his/her assistance. Make sure they repeat them - this will help them remember.
• Emphasize the child's strengths and minimize the weaknesses.
• Set your child up to be successful when the opportunity presents itself.
• Provide opportunities for the child to reiterate expectations. For example: "What always needs to be done before bed?"
• Encourage the child to participate and monitor their own behavior. For example: "What is terrific about what you're doing right now?"
• AVOID power struggles - nobody wins!
• Take time to discuss appropriate and inappropriate behaviors.
• Routines - children with behavior difficulties benefit from clearly established routines, I can't say enough about this.
• Role play some situations based on unacceptable behaviors and discuss them.
• Set up practice situations and role play those. For example: Tommy just came and stepped on your toe, you even though he did it intentionally. How will you handle this situation?
• Teach the skills necessary for appropriate behaviors.

If you're this far - you're concerned and you want some strategies. Now you're ready for the implementation stage. You are now ready for the 5-step plan:

1. Pinpoint the behavior that you want to change. Be specific.
2. Gather your information. When does the unacceptable behavior occur? How often does it occur? Under which circumstances does it occur? What event precedes the behavior? What is the child's view of the behavior? Does the inappropriate behavior always happen when the child is alone? Supervised? With others? At a specific time?
3. Now it's time for you to interpret what the information may mean from the previous step. Give it your best shot when trying to analyze the information you've gathered.
4. Plan for Change! Now it's time to set your goals - with the child. What are the short term goals? What are the long term goals? Who's involved, what will happen. The plan for change should be collaborative between you and the child. Be specific, for instance: Johnny will not yell and scream when it's time to do homework - or time to go to bed. In your plan for change, some rewards and or a reward system should be in place. For instance, when 5 instances of appropriate behavior happens, Johnny will have .............(opportunity to indulge in his favorite activity, a new sticker book etc.
5. Evaluate how your plan is working. If it isn't working, make the necessary changes collaboratively.

Once again, if after several consistent tries you find your plan isn't working and there is no noticeable change in the unacceptable behaviors, the child may need to be referred to a specialist.
Source: by Sue Watson